Nightglow Window

Super Bowl Commercials: Instant Critic

3:18 p.m. Jordan Sparks sings National Anthem. No wardrobe malfunctions,which is a blessing. Almost too solid, but she's no Whitney Houston at Super Bowl 25.

3:27 p.m. Giants win the toss, and the real (commercial) show begins.

3:30 p.m. Ford F-150 tow hooks are freakishly strong as a big red truck takes a spin around a custom-made centrifuge. How much did that set up cost?

3:36 p.m. Anheuser Busch Bud Light beer makes you breathe fire = makes me give the commercial an out loud chuckle.

3:38 p.m. Godfather horsehead redux commercial by Audi misses the mark. Cool car, lame ad. Once was enough.

3:46 p.m. Pepsi Max gets sleepy. I guess Haddaway's "What Is Love" makes people fall asleep. And here I thought it just made them vomit. Next!

3:47 p.m. Salesgenie.com: Come on, I heard the spots were written by the CEO. This one is so bad, it's almost cool.

3:48 p.m. Under Armour Super Bowl Commercial: This one was a tad overwrought, wasn't it? Is this underwear company making shoes now? Weird. Nike wanna-be's?

3:50 p.m. Bud Light Number Two: Cheese Party = cheesy ad.

4:01 p.m. Bridgestone Screaming Squirrels and upset forest animals = Funny. I'd watch this one again.

4:03 p.m. New England Goes up 7 to 3.

4:04 p.m. Angelina Jolie is way hot. That link is for you Barry.

4:05 p.m. Danica Patrick's "banned ad" spot make me log on to GoDaddy.com for the first time ever. General boredom ensues. Success?

4:07 p.m. Carrier Pigeons take over FedEx Super Bowl Commercial: Solid. Like it. Pretty good FX too.

4:08 p.m. Tide "talking stain" Super Bowl Commercial: Takes me the whole commercial to "get it," but funny once I do.

4:14 p.m. New England intercepts.

4:15 p.m. Budweiser Super Bowl Commercial = Hank the Clydesdale goes all Rocky on us and makes the team--with the special help of a . . . dalmatian. (?)

4:19 p.m. Thanks to Toyota Corolla I now know that a sleeping badger will "eat your face off" if wakened. Ain't TV educational? Animal theme continues unabated.

4:21 p.m. I like the the music on the Garmin ad.

4:25 p.m. Careerbuilder.com's "quitting heart" is just plan gross. General groans all around the room.

4:26 p.m. Someone from Sobe's Life Water has been watching YouTube. Really bad.

4:28 p.m. Wifi Connection lost/bathroom break. Millions of dollars in ads go unwatched.

4:38 p.m. Spot for Walt Disney's Narnia "Prince Caspian" Yes indeed, I'll see this one.

4:40 p.m. Ugly Betty uses peanuts to create mayhem. Eat Planter's Nuts and bad things will happen to those around you too.

4:41 p.m. Charles Barkley is past his expiration date.

4:44 p.m. Pepsi goes for the double entendre as Justin Timberlake gets sucked all the way across town. I admit it, I like it. But I have been reading Tucker Max lately, so what did you expect?

4:55 p.m. End of the first half and the great nightglowindow "Super Bowl Commercial" traffic test is now complete. Stay tuned for the results.